Wednesday, March 25, 2009

A case of the blahs...short vent

I find myself emotionally and physically down since coming back from spring break. I feel more tired than before and every single morning this week I have absolutely dreaded getting up and going to work beyond anything I've ever felt dread for. It's depressing. Once I get to work it's not so bad, it's getting myself out of bed for it. I haven't slept great, I have this wierd pain behind my left lung that is sharp and very painful when I'm sitting or any time I bend over. This frustrates me throughout the day and gets in the way of my sleep. My belly is also to the point where it is beginning to make my sleep VERY uncomfortable so I toss and turn all night, therefore, not getting enough sleep. I look ahead at the next three months and just feel this dark cloud over my head about how horrible it's going to be dragging myself to work everyday and dealing with my 147 squarrely teenagers. It just feels like July will never get here and then when it does, I'll barely have time with my new baby before I'm back to doing this again. ugh.

I just felt like venting how I was feeling. It's not that I'm not completely grateful for my job. Please don't get me wrong on that. I am. I am very blessed to have such a stable, well-paying job during an economic time like this. It's just wearing on my right now during my pregnancy. It also doesn't help that I don't get to see my hubby except for Saturday, Sunday and Monday evenings now that his regular evening work schedule is up and running. I miss our time together. I miss seeing his face. I miss getting to talk to him more than just good night because I have to be in bed before or right when he gets home. I miss him. :( I know this won't be a long term set up and I'm grateful for the fact that he is working and helping support our little family and also going to school full time. I'm very proud of him for the hard work he is putting in right now. I just miss him and look forward to the future when we get to reap the hard work.

That's all for now. I don't want to sound like I'm throwing a pity party here. I guess I just have a case of the blues right now. Hopefully they will pass quickly. They usually do.

Looking forward to my next doctor's appointment on Tuesday. Hoping for a miracle that the ultra sound tech is still there at 4 in the afternoon and can take another peak!


Lydia said...

I can understand! What you're feeling is totally normal. I remember the exact same feelings when I was pregnant with Garrett and teaching. And I totally feel your pain on having trouble getting comfy at night! My doctor ok'd me taking a mild sleeping pill to help, so you might ask your doctor next week about something like that. I take "Simply Sleep" but I've also heard of pregnant women taking Unisom. It definitely helps me, while I do have trouble initially getting comfortable, I don't wake up throughout the night, any time I need to roll over. Good luck at your next appt! I hope the tech is there and able to do an ultrasound for you.

Melissa@MamaMonoblogs said...

That pain you're feeling is probably a foot or an arm-LOL! I'm sorry it's depressing right for you. Hang in there. The end result is worth it. Just remember to enjoy every second, come July, and be happy in knowing Brooklyn will be with people that love her and can give her special attention.Just think how much worse you would feel if you had to leave her with strangers. That is not a fun feeling! And we'll all keep praying that you can stay home with her soon. Good luck at your appt!

Aileen said...

I know it's difficult for you right now, but thankfully it won't last forever! Brooklyn has to be born here in 3 months, so at least you know this isn't a permanent situation! I just want you to get your rest and try to sleep alot. Take you sleeping aid when you have to and get the rest, I think that is essential.

Jackie's Little World said...

I totally had that same pain...and I do believe it was a body part jammed up in there b/c it was instantly gone after Ava was out. And the next 3 months may be really terrible comfort-wise, but after you have the baby you somehow miraculously forget every terrible thing about your pregnancy and convince yourself the things you remember weren't so bad. haha! And I'm sorry you don't get to see Waylon's so lame to have such out of sync schedules...just sneack in whatever time you can. I've been praying for you!!! Can't wait to see itty bitty brooklyn! cook her up good :-)