I find myself emotionally and physically down since coming back from spring break. I feel more tired than before and every single morning this week I have absolutely dreaded getting up and going to work beyond anything I've ever felt dread for. It's depressing. Once I get to work it's not so bad, it's getting myself out of bed for it. I haven't slept great, I have this wierd pain behind my left lung that is sharp and very painful when I'm sitting or any time I bend over. This frustrates me throughout the day and gets in the way of my sleep. My belly is also to the point where it is beginning to make my sleep VERY uncomfortable so I toss and turn all night, therefore, not getting enough sleep. I look ahead at the next three months and just feel this dark cloud over my head about how horrible it's going to be dragging myself to work everyday and dealing with my 147 squarrely teenagers. It just feels like July will never get here and then when it does, I'll barely have time with my new baby before I'm back to doing this again. ugh.
I just felt like venting how I was feeling. It's not that I'm not completely grateful for my job. Please don't get me wrong on that. I am. I am very blessed to have such a stable, well-paying job during an economic time like this. It's just wearing on my right now during my pregnancy. It also doesn't help that I don't get to see my hubby except for Saturday, Sunday and Monday evenings now that his regular evening work schedule is up and running. I miss our time together. I miss seeing his face. I miss getting to talk to him more than just good night because I have to be in bed before or right when he gets home. I miss him. :( I know this won't be a long term set up and I'm grateful for the fact that he is working and helping support our little family and also going to school full time. I'm very proud of him for the hard work he is putting in right now. I just miss him and look forward to the future when we get to reap the hard work.
That's all for now. I don't want to sound like I'm throwing a pity party here. I guess I just have a case of the blues right now. Hopefully they will pass quickly. They usually do.
Looking forward to my next doctor's appointment on Tuesday. Hoping for a miracle that the ultra sound tech is still there at 4 in the afternoon and can take another peak!